A few years ago, I was hosting an event at my house. During a conversation about birth order, one of my new friends assumed I was the second child in my family. I wasn’t sure if I should feel insulted or flattered.
I should start by telling you that I have a younger sister and have always thought of myself as having the typical first-born personality traits. But I must say, part of me envies the carefree stereotypical traits of a younger child.
This was why I couldn’t decide if I was flattered or insulted. I wasn’t sure which way I preferred to be viewed. The first-born (insulted) part of me immediately felt defensive and thought – maybe I am not being that attentive of a hostess, maybe this breakfast doesn’t seem very well planned or put together, maybe I don’t seem organized…
And then a flattered feeling came over me and thought – Wow I am pulling this off so well that I actually seem relaxed and carefree. I actually appear to be the second born. I must be amazing – lol!
I just came across this article about birth order – Huffington Post – How Birth Order Affects Personality and I started thinking how my two boys fit into the birth order stereotypes…
My older son is the organized, planner. He is a rule follower and even a little bossy at times. He wakes up early almost every day; even on weekends. He needs to know everything and likes to be in control. He is sweet and polite and likes to do things the right way.
(My older son – getting the kite ready to fly.)
My younger son is the party kid. He could probably be considered the “class clown” and sometimes fools around a little too much. He is the late sleeper and doesn’t worry about anything. He makes me laugh every single day and loves “performing” for a crowd. He is smart but doesn’t get stressed out about school or anything for that matter.
(My younger son – running around after the kite)
A couple summers ago, both of my boys were taking a week of golf lessons. I remember dropping them off one day and as I walked back to my car, I noticed their group heading out to the driving range. Walking first in line, in fact way ahead of the group (and way ahead of the golf instructor), was my older son. He marched out there like he meant business. He was there to learn golf and he was ready to get started. Behind him followed the instructor, then one or two kids. And behind them paraded a cluster of kids bouncing along without any urgency. You could tell they were laughing and having a great time. Yes, that was my younger son’s group. I stood there observing and thought to myself how this little display completely summed up the personalities of both of my boys.
That is just one example of the many times both boys have demonstrated their birth order.
I know deep down inside that I have a first-born personality even though I may be able to fool some people some of the time. First of all, the fact that I had to analyze the whole conversation from years ago speaks volumes! And since that day, I have managed to pull off some pretty involved school events, proving my first born status to my friend – LOL. Seriously though, I know if I don’t have a plan for almost everything I do, I get pretty stressed out. For example, it took months for me to decide to get a dog. I researched breeds, interviewed breeders, got recommendations from many friends and didn’t proceed until I had every question answered and every supply purchased. My younger sister on the other hand, announced one day that she might get a dog and a couple days later – she had one.
I am not saying that I don’t envy the relaxed attitude of a second born child, I just know where I fit in. Yet now that I am in the midst of working on another school event scheduled for the spring, I am hoping I can channel just a little bit of of my younger sister’s second child mellow attitude and not be so stressed out!
Does your personality reflect your birth order?
What about your kids?
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